What Are Your Adjectives?

On our first call, a potential client said, “My daughter strives to keep her room tidy because she wants her space too feel ‘Clean crisp serene minimal.’”

“Pause, Mom. What are YOUR adjectives?”

She couldn’t initially give an answer. (I wondered if she had a thought like…”could it be that there’s another way to feel in this space?”)

It’s like the quote from Joshua Becker, “picture your dream home. I bet it’s not filled with clutter.”

“I want to feel anxious, overwhelmed, like I’m failing at life, and also fight with my family over the state of my home,” SAID NO ONE EVER.

Yet this is literally what so many of my clients say. They feel this way in their own house—a home, which is supposed to be the solace for stress, not the source of it.

It’s heartbreaking to hear and also 💯% normal. So common and so unnecessary.

Maybe it’s a fixed mindset or an undertrained skillset for the process. Maybe it wasn’t a family value growing up and you didn’t learn how. Maybe it’s situational and you’re in a wildly busy season of life and you paused on the clutter a bit too long and now it’s overtaking your space. Maybe it’s time, energy, health/wellness, other family members—so many things get in the way of resolution.

Say no. Say no more. You deserve to feel calm in your home. You deserve to sit down after a long day, kick up your feet, and simply feel good. Grateful. Able to rest. 

You cannot do this when you have to spend a few minutes clearing a space on the couch. When you don’t have an inch of free space on the end table to place your glass of wine. When everything in your line of space is misplaced junk that is lacking a home and has zero purpose in this room. When the mental load of the clutter wears and tears you more each day.

It’s time to let go.

“It’ll be better when…” wow isn’t this the most dangerous verbiage to give yourself excuses, permission to allow things to stay in this messy limbo. 

“It’ll be better when… I have a weekend with no plans so I can finally get the kitchen in order.” Mom empties every single drawer, cabinet, and the whole pantry and then feels overwhelmed and exhausted and like the mountain of stuff is insurmountable—and quits. Her partner is annoyed and shoved everything away as quickly as possible.

Does this sound familiar? Has this happened to you? 

Panic, decision fatigue, instant regret—it’s all real when most of us try to tackle a job this big alone. And it only worsens the shame cycle and makes it harder to try again. 

There is a better way. Imagine laughing as you declutter your kitchen. Imagine singing 90s pop songs or old Broadway show tunes or Motown and letting out a huge sigh as you let go of 11 of your 13 spatulas. Imagine seeing your home as a blank canvas, emptied, to envision a new way, new systems, new routines, new appreciation for the curated best of the best items you own. Imagine watching a car full of clutter disappear from your home and the look of joy when something you had buried in a dusty box is now in the hands of a person who legitimately needed and loves it now. Imagine that “ it is enjoyable to simply sit [in the basement] and look at the space that she created for my family.”

The adjectives I want for my clients are gratitude, rest, calm, connection, joy. 

Let me ask again, what are the adjectives that describe how you feel in your home now, and what are your dream adjectives?

Book a free call to see how I can help you get from A (🤪😭🤬😱) to B (😄☺️🥳🤩😍).

It’s a beautiful day to release the excess and reclaim your space!