What to do when you KNOW you have too much clutter
“I know I have way too much stuff,” says pretty much every single person I speak with about how they’re feeling about the current state of their home.
Want advice from a professional organizer and a ? Don’t even for one second judge yourself. You are a human being who is targeted by consumerism every single day.
EDIT YOUR MINDSET
Lack of self-compassion and simply beating yourself up for acknowledging your excess—guess what? That’s rooted in shame, and it’s only going to stall your progress toward letting go and conquering the clutter.
So, you recognize you have too much. Well done, that’s brave right there to admit out loud.
Lean into the discomfort of knowing you have overconsumed. It’s OK to feel guilty, to feel regret, to feel duped, to feel angry. Whatever you feel is OK—be kind with these emotions. Feel it first so you can move through it.
Consider WHY (and why NOW) you want to make changes to reduce, to get control, to feel peace in your home. What happens if you choose to stay “blind” to your clutter? What happens if you refuse to budge on any of your belongings or alter your routines?
Be brutally (and gently!) honest with yourself about what you really want for yourself, your family, your spaces—and what it will take to get there.
Be realistic about getting your home in order: This didn’t happen overnight; accept that there is no quick fix, but intention and consistency will be your guiding light. Know that it’s manageable when you break it down into small, concrete tasks (or categories)—instead of “I have to declutter my whole house.”
Self-reflection will help you move through—and forward—closer to your goals. Being honest with yourself yields better outcomes. Take notes, make lists, bounce ideas off your partner, sit with what comes up.
TAKE INVENTORY (Nonjudgmentally!)
Do you know what you have, how much of it, where all of it is? This is a huge initial step. Some call it taking inventory. It’s not like we have zero pairs of jeans, and then one day we buy ten pairs of jeans, and now we have ten.
We have a bunch, we shop for more as the seasons change and for special occasions, we pick up some on sale when we were only at the store for toothpaste, we snag a cute pair or two on Buy Nothing, a friend gives you a few she doesn’t fit into anymore, you see a lightning deal on amazon for a certain shade (you can’t remember if you even have). So you started with six and now you have…53?
“Sometimes, just seeing all of your belongings laid out before you can be enough to acknowledge you have too much. I took this a step further, by doing a complete inventory of the one area of my life where I knew I had too much stuff: my wardrobe. Not only did it help me acknowledge my affinity for bargain shopping, but it also served as a reminder of where I never wanted to be again. Even though I knew I had a lot of jeans, the reality of my excess hit differently once I counted more than 50 pairs. There’s acknowledging that you have ‘a lot of jeans,’ and there’s the acknowledgment of understanding that you have 53 pairs of jeans, but only wear the same two.” Christine Platt, The Afrominimalist’s Guide to Living With Less
What’s important to note is that you can’t know if you have 53 pairs of jeans unless you go through your entire home to find each pair, including the laundry, including still in your luggage, including under the bed, including in the “I hope to get back to this size” bin in the basement. Bring them all out.
One of my FAVORITE books on the subject. I couldn’t put it down. I promise you’ll be inspired!
5 EXAMPLES OF CATEGORIES FOR CONSCIOUS PARING DOWN
Coffee mugs. Now, look. Make observations. “We have 79 coffee mugs between the four of us. We use approximately 8 of these. This one is chipped. This one is from my ex. This one feels weird when you sip form it. This one is stained. These are dusty. This one is sentimental because it has our grandkids’ faces on it, and also it’s faded and not a favorite and I do feel guilt at the thought of letting it go.”
Pick out your favorites, the best of the best. The ones that you’d buy right now at regular price if you saw it in a store. The ones you cherish, that make you feel good to hold and use. Curate a beverage center that feels cozy and special because it holds only what you need, use, and love.
Journals/notebooks. As a professional organizer, I see this a lot. Tons of pretty books with an inspirational cover for writing, doodling, daydreaming, that have only a few pages filled. Or all blank pages. Or a mashup of notes/lists.
If you are truthful with yourself, will you really use these? Do you need this many? Can any of these have a page or three torn out and be donated? Can any of this be recycled? Let’s say you love them and won’t pare down. Make a rule that you don’t buy any more until you use every single sheet of paper in every last journal you already have. Guess what? You can change your mind, too!
Sweatshirts (or any article of clothing you know you have too much of). Just count them. Notice how many you have. Take note of what you see. “This one is from college. These are too tight. This one has a bad stain. This one reminds me of an unpleasant event. These are a color I don’t like to wear anymore. This one doesn’t have pockets?!???!?”)
Can you pare down to your absolute favorites? The ones you wear most? That fit today’s body? That are in good condition (free from stains, rips, wear and tear)? That feel so soft and warm (and not itchy, irritable)? That you love how you look AND feel in them?
Holiday decor. In my experience, the work of planning, decorating, cleaning, breaking down, and putting away of any/all holiday decor is on YOU (the mom, the matriarch, the woman). It’s OK to keep what you have if you love it, use it, and are OK with the extra work of maintaining/displaying each season. If you find yourself cursing how much you have as you try to cram it back into the bins, or running out of steam as you try to hang yet another item, it could be a sign you have too much.
Know that this is YOUR home, your family, your holidays, your choice. You can let go of decor that is not meaningful to you (but that maybe a family member gave you). You can choose not to keep religious items that you inherited if it’s not for you. You can keep one or two beloved Santas and donate the rest. Your tree doesn’t need an ornament on every single branch. You can focus on LESS but in a way that honors your family, your traditions, your values most.
Seeing it all in one place helps you really pull out the most special. And use the containers as a boundary. Do you want to be responsible for four bins of Valentine’s Day decor, or would one suffice? Can you reduce your fall decor from six bins to two? Challenge yourself, consider what’s worth storing, how much work you want to give yourself.
Family board/card games. Are your kids now teens and you still have Candy Land (that’s so common!)? Do you have four sets of Monopoly? Do you have games with missing pieces, incomplete sets, not functional to play? Do you have games unopened/brand new because they were gifts and…you’re just not that into it? Do you have 58 train/truck/car puzzles because your little one is obsessed and everyone knows it?
Keep what you play. Sometimes we have this vision that our family/kids will love to play games with us, but in reality, they just simply…don’t; it’s OK to be sad about that. Keep your favorites and invite over a friend. Recycle what you can of games that are not fully intact. Donate the rest (send me a message if you want suggestions for where!). Let other families experience the fun and friendly competition that yours once enjoyed.
Having family favorites means less decision fatigue/less indecision. Fewer barriers to what you want to happen. When you open a cabinet and see your favorites, it motivates you to play (and take care of your belongings!). Less time/energy spent looking around for items, debating, getting interrupted = more time for family, fun, and the stuff that matters
BRING INTENTION TO THE PROCESS
Shelf by shelf, drawer by drawer, you’ll be curating a home filled with only what you love and use. You’ll feel gratitude and relief to see your belongings shining brightly in their new homes—instead of overstimulation, shame, chaos.
It might feel uncomfortable to let go. After all, you’ve been surrounded by this clutter which is a discomfort you’ve become used to. Let yourself be uncomfortable. Decluttering is a muscle to be strengthened. And you will get faster, it will get easier.
The final most important step is to MOBILIZE THAT CLUTTER. Have a plan to get items for donation out of your home; put them in your car; know where you want to drop off.
This is an important step many of my clients don’t take. You run the risk of others putting items “away,” your pile being buried, or changing your mind. Knowing WHERE you’ll donate items before you start paring down will help ensure their prompt exit!
It’s not “failing” if you want/need professional help. I’m so fortunate that my passion and profound love of the work of organizing and decluttering has brought to life the most fulfilling purpose—Consciously Cleared and Contained. I come with empathy and expertise to help get it done. No judgment, no shame.
“The best way to get something done is to begin.” Author Unknown